Protection

The millions of American soldiers, men and women, serving our country and overseas are to be admired. Since 9/11 and the War in Iraq/Afghanistan these are the true Americans who continue to protect our way of life.
This patriotic sentiment is not expressed by all soldiers.
For some military females, they not only have to protect our country, but they have to protect themselves. The silent reality; male soldiers are sexually harassing female soldiers. Women are finding it difficult to end relationships with fellow soldiers who aren't taking "no" for an answer. To those women who are struggling with this, we must give them our unconditional support. If this happens more often than not, why isn't the US Military taking these threats more seriously? The first step is talking about this issue.

To find out more about these unfortunate circumstances, check out http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/28/us/28women.html?_r=1&hp.

Shame, Shame, Shame

If you catch a cold, chances are, it will be passed on.

At the height of the flu season, many companies are gearing up for expected sick days from workers--it happens.

Wal-Mart takes a rather unethical approach toward employees for calling out sick. Instead, contagious employees are given a demerit badge for every sick day accumulated. This is the sad reality; we are in a deep recession, Swine Flu has everyone on pins and needles and now, hard-working individuals have to fear punishment. Talk about being stuck between a rock and a hard place!

All hope is not lost. If you visit www.demeritwalmart.com you can give Wal-Mart a demerit for imposing this unfair, callous rule towards people trying a make ends meet. Lets help them out!

And to the employees--stay strong!

What We Ponder

Marriage is suppose to be a joyous time, a time when two people fall in love and make a promise to one another. A promise of faithfulness, commitment. A promise to remain upbeat when times are rough. No one was expecting an outstanding athlete like Tiger Woods to cheat on his wife, model Elin Nordegren, with multiple women. No one expected the man that changed the game of golf to openly financially support women who were not his wife. No one expected the father of two young children to tell a few of his women that he was unhappy with his life at home and no one expected to read this information in a text.
As the air grows stagnant and we ponder about the future of Woods, there needs to be time for the Woods' to gather their bearings and lean towards healing. In a society that expects to know everything about everyone at anytime, perhaps we need to reflect on the troubles that have befallen the famed golfer and his wife. Perhaps their problems are deeper than we understand. Perhaps we can offer kind words, respect and space, so that they can remain strong and hopeful that the promise they made to one another can be carried out.

Book Review

A good book could stumble upon you as unexpectedly as a rain shower, whether or not it is needed. However it comes, a great read is sure to spark good conversation.
For young adult readers, literature tends to be outdated or excruciatingly boring. Enter The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky.
The story centers around Charlie who, through a series of quirky, detailed letters, tells a "friend" about his school year and the chaos that comes with being a teen. A true page turner, the book gets to the heart of what I Stay Strong is about, finding strength through adversity. Charlie is an interesting character and Chbosky's description of each character really brings the book to life. Charlie uses his writing as a means to find himself through dire circumstances. The book is also a great stepping stone for those who want to read great literature, as several classics are mentioned; The Catcher and the Rye, The Color Purple and Hamlet. Happy reading!

Pick Me Up

Words. Whether written or spoken, words are often conveyed through subliminal messages; a billboard, a used magazine, a random stranger, a blog, yet sometimes words are given to us straightforwardly.

It's all a blessing in disguise. If by any chance you need a pick me up, if you face adversity, here are four strong quotes that ought to make your day a bit brighter:

"In prosperity, our friends know us; in adversity, we know our friends." --John Churton Collins

"When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it." --Henry Ford

"Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit." -- Napoleon Hill

"Count the garden by the flowers, never by the leaves that fall. Count your life with smiles and not the tears that roll." -- Author Unknown

M.A.D.E

Dating is tough. And if your a teenager dating, it's even tougher. Sadly, there is a disturbing trend on the rise and it's affecting teens across the country; teen dating violence.

With teen dating violence becoming more frequent, you can bet that there are strong men and women bonding together, offering support and a safe haven for teenagers. Enter MADE (Moms and Dads for Education), sponsored by Liz Claiborne, this courageous group is out to educate teens about the dangers of unhealthy dating. Dating violence is an issue that parents want educators to emphasize in our nations schools.

The cool thing, you don't have to be a parent to get involved. Simply log onto www.loveisnotabuse.com for more info.

Don't wait another moment, Let us act now; you just might save the life of a teen.

Press Send

There use to be a time when sending a letter, a pen pal letter was something special. Perhaps in your heyday, or not, you passed love notes to a boy or girl in your English class. Maybe you were surrounded by friends and enemies that either loved you or hated you; they told you this to your face. Needless to say, it was personal.

The world is spinning and technology is taking us places we'd never expected to go. With social networking, including blogging, it's easy to get connected and stay connected. Even with our cell phones, we can shop, play games and chat with a long distance relative. Christmas cards? E-cards are quicker and no postage is needed. Plus, don't they come with a special Christmas jingle just for you? Seriously, why bother meeting Johnny at the local coffee shop when you can find out about his latest academic fete with the click of a button?

Maybe you should bother. Maybe you need to put down the phone, log off the computer and knock on Johnny's door and ask, "hey, do you want to go for a walk?"

Yes, human connection is still important, it's a detrimental part of our development. Technology and all its convenience is swell, but what's better than a good old fashion hug or a genuine Christmas card, better yet, a well intended handwritten note.

No life doesn't get better than that.

Another Name for It

Robin Fenty, otherwise known as superstar Rhianna, didn't expect the world to view her battered face, after her then boyfriend Chris Brown assaulted her earlier this year. Rhianna, like most women involved in an abusive relationship, went back to Brown shortly after the incident.

Rhianna spoke to ABC's Diane Sawyer about the incident, sighting that she decided to leave Brown after feeling she would be responsible for young women, who are knowingly involved in an abusive relationship, to go back to their partners. The singer pointed out that she couldn't live with herself if that had happened.

These days, the media is increasingly holding celebrities accountable for their actions. Through the media stars are able to let the public in on their daily lives. It cannot be easy to divulge such private information to the outside world, yet the times we live in call for consistent knowledge of others.

Thankfully, Rhianna put fourth a positive message to abuse victims. Some media outlets have gone as far as calling her interview a fraud, a publicity stunt or saying her "people" made her do it. Regardless of the negative attitude, Rhianna shared what she called "embarrassing" information with the public. Additionally, some media outlets claim that Rhianna was abusive toward Brown.

Despite the opinions of others, Rhianna was courageous in her intent. May she continue to take this experience and learn from it and more importantly, may she continue to stay strong.

Passion

Football is an amazing sport. According to Wikipedia, professional football dates back to 1892. Like baseball, football is a sport adored by most Americans, in fact football draws in over 10 million viewers annually.

The passion that football fans have for the sport is the essence of the game. Brett Farve, a well known quarteback, played for the Wisconsin Green Bay Packers from 1992 - 2007. Since then the National Football League superstar has left his beloved hometown; Farve now plays for the Minnesota Vikings. This sounds simple enough; Farve didn't exactly switch cubicles. Beloved by thousands of die hard Green Bay fans, Farve, through his own admission, felt it was time to leave the team. Green Bay fans were none to thrilled.

When the Packers finally met up with the Vikings, Favre was booed throughout the game. This didn't deter Farve from playing his best, taking his team with him.

We all draw strength from obvious and less obvious places. Sometimes we make changes in life that aren't always up to everyone's standards. One thing remains, we should always trust our instincts and always be the best we can be, no matter what anyone says.

Brain Game

The brain is fragile, an organ to be nurtured in every way possible. A good way to stay sharp is to play games!

Challenging yourself to a game of Sudoko, completing a crossword puzzle or simply gathering the family around the table for an intense game of Scrabble is just what the doctor ordered.

What do you do to exercise your brain?

The End

There is this belief that looms over our society; the belief that the world, as we know it, is coming to an end. With Hollywood pumping out movies such as I Am Legend, The Knowing and 2012, all symbolizing the end, what else are we suppose to infer?

It is the job of the entertainment industry to "entertain" us, though it would be slightly more comforting if we had more movies that empowered us to stay strong through real chaos; war, racism, famine, women and gay rights, terrorism.

Yes, there is so much more to be done in society, so much we need to accomplish as people.

Innately, we are strong. People exhibit strength though the most dire circumstances (9/11, Hurricane Katrina). It's amazing what happens when we put aside or differences and really come together as humans, not color, not race, not social class, but as people that care about our future.

Forget the fodder of Hollywood. Yes, we don't need their outlandish views on how it will all "end," we need them to show us the beginning.

Always Be Confident

You have to admit; women are always trying to better themselves in everything they do. Whether it's work, school or family life, the plight of the woman is to always stay true to oneself.

In the November issue of Glamour Magazine, the article, "The Seven Different Kinds of Confidence Every Woman Needs," a compilation of celebrity women discuss how they maintain their confidence and offer some solid advice. One worth noting is Tracee Ellis Ross, daughter of the diva of all diva's Diana Ross.

Ellis Ross writes about having confidence in who you really are. The former star of the urban hit Girlfriends, chats about the steps she took to get there. For example, Ellis Ross says she made peace with her ultra curly locks, remembers to take deep breaths in situations that make her nervous and gives herself a break when needed.

I Stay Strong is build around encouraging everyone to be strong, no matter what they are going through, no matter who they are, it is always nice to know that there are others delivering the same message.

And Then There Was Hope

October marks Breast Cancer Awareness Month. It is a time where women, men and children participate in charity events across the country in support of finding a cure for the encroaching disease. Even the NFL is joining the fight--players are wearing shades of pink on their gloves, hats and sneakers!

There is another fighter amongst us. Hope Nemiroff, co-founder and executive director of Breast Cancer Options (BCO), a non-profit organization established in 2000, is a courageous woman. Nemiroff, a breast cancer survivor, decided not to let cancer rule her. Instead, she set out to help women gain knowledge about cancer.

BCO acts as a guide to women diagnosed with the deadly disease. BCO is a place of solace and fortitude. Located in Kingston, New York, BCO offers legal advice, contact with breast cancer survivors, counseling and other resources including support for children.

It's pretty safe to say that having a woman like Nemiroff in your corner packs a mighty punch.

For more information or to make a donation contact:
Breast Cancer Options
101 Hurley Ave.
Kingston, NY 12401
845-339-HOPE

Some Secrets

Mackenzie Phillips recently sat down with Oprah Winfrey to discuss the incest that went on when she was a young woman; Mackenzie alleges her father had sexual intercourse with her for ten years. The man accused is her deceased father, 60's performer John Phillips.

Phillips has upset relatives and family members since coming out with the accusations.

Though, there are two sides to every story and Mr. Phillips is not here to tell his, the fact that Ms. Phillips was able to come fourth and divulge such a horrific secret, shows how strong she is for being able to stay so.

A Marathon of the Heart

Being an active participant in the community is something I Stay Strong admires. Without volunteers and the like, most communities wouldn't survive.

Today, The Dutchess County Marathon was held at the Wappingers Recreation Center in Wappinger, NY. Under a bright blue sky and a warm sun, eager participants ran the 13.5 mile route complete with sprawling hills, lush trees and spacious terrain. The weather was perfect, cool and crisp. The energy was high and ISS was there to support students in the Hyde Park Central School District.

While running itself is done individually, it is a courageous sport, a sport filled with people with BIG hearts. Residents who support their community and do things for the greater good were found in Wappinger. Students and educators from Our Lady of Lourdes School were spotted running for the memory of their beloved Lizzie Miller.

Optimism is the greatest tool to living a great life. -Lizzie Miller 1990 - 2009

The women, young and old, stood beside each other all sporting dark green shirts with yellow lettering, Miller's quote printed clearly on the back of their shirts. This quote easily tugs at the heart strings. No matter what circumstances we may face, sometimes having an optimistic attitude makes all the difference. Obviously, the great mind behind the words is no longer here with us. How blessed is she to have a group of supporters who have gathered in honor of her precious memory? Is there any gesture with more heart?

With adoring smiles and pleasant attitudes and not a frown seen on their faces, it looks like the optimism Miller talked about has spread.

For more information on this event go to: http://www.dcclassic.com/
For more information on Lizzie Miller go to: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=96092073317

A Teenage Epidemic

Bristol Palin. Jamie-Lynn Spears. Solange Knowles. Brandy. All were teenage mothers. They are the young celebrities that have brought more attention to an already growing epidemic; teenage pregnancy.

Statistics show that the United States has the highest rate of teen pregnancies. While the issue itself is an international concern, the US has yet to tackle this growing problem. Between conservatives strongly promoting abstinence and the longstanding debate of allowing sex education to be a topic in schools, teen pregnancy gets pushed to the back burner.

*Jannie Sweeney remembered when, at age 15, she decided to have unprotected sex; her son, *Jake Morris, was born nine months later.

"I wouldn't want anyone to go through that. I didn't talk to my parents about sex. I went around relying on my friends for information about sex. For them, it was the cool thing to do."

Despite her parents disappointment, Sweeney was able to complete high school.

" I could not have finished school with the help of my family," Sweeney admitted.

The family supported her vigorously, taking turns babysitting Jake and making sure that he was well cared and provided for. Sweeney also credits her parents for using her pregnancy as a learning tool and instilling in her siblings that choosing to have sex meant risking the chance of getting pregnant or contracting an STD. More importantly, Sweeney says her parents also gave her and her siblings information about sex. The topic became normal conversation around the house.

Sweeney, now 35, is proud of Jake Morris, 20, who is attending college. With her families help, Sweeney was able to be a better parent.

"I am proud of my son. But if I could, I would have waited until I was old enough to deal with motherhood."

I Stay Strong asked Sweeney for insight. Her advice to today's teens, "ask questions, but don't ask your friends, connect with your parents, doctors or clergymen. All I can say is you have to get information; have protected sex or abstain."

In a world of celebrity and an "anything goes" attitude, today's youth has to battle with moral judgment more so now than ever. The media glorifies unwed mothers and the traditional route of marriage, making the responsibilities of parenthood less apparent.

Teenage parents don't always have success stories. The life of a teenage parent is a struggle, but with the right information, family support and good judgment, teens can make better decisions about sex and together communities around the country can witness a decline in a scary statistic.

School Daze

For teens and young men and women around the country, school is already in session or is about to start. Whether you just started high school or you're entering your first year of college, the world of education brings about a fresh start.

Its no easy feat to start anew, so here are a few tips to get you started:

1. Set goals for yourself. The more you plan and research what it is you want to accomplish, the better you will feel about yourself and you'd be more willing to help others.
2. Don't dwell on last year. We all make mistakes. Look at this school year as a fresh start. Any regrets you might have, put them aside.
3. Keep positive people around you. The power of positivity runs ramped in this blog. Being positive really keeps life in perspective, no matter what the circumstances.
4. Read, research and ask questions. The more you read, the more you will understand. Internet research provides opportunities to assist you in paperwork and other projects. If you don't know something, ask.
5. Let loose. Don't chain yourself to a desk or spend countless hours at a public library. Make sure you take time out for yourself. Do get exercise, eat a healthy diet and engage in a positive activity that is rewarding to your soul.

Best of luck!

5 Simple Steps

If there was enough money to go around the world and back again, fewer problems would exist in the world. We'd be able to feed the hungry, everyone would have a job and everyone would be able to afford a good solid education.

Of course, that's not the case.

Debt is swallowing Americans whole. Statistics show that even big corporations such as Washington Mutual aren't safe from debt.

Dept takes down more than corporations; debt can harm a marriage, friendship, a family or any other type of relationship. If big companies can't control their monies, how can we? ISS offers 5 simple steps to getting on the fast track to getting out of debt:

1. Develop a plan on how you will conquer your debt.
2. Seek out financial services that offer debt management or consolidation.
3. With many famous financial gurus like Dave Ramsey and Suze Orman, getting financial help is a mere click away (see below).
4. Be patient. Getting out of debt will take time, commitment and consistency.
5. Communicate. No matter what, keep your partner, spouse, family or friend informed about your financial goals.

Money management is essential. When you have a grasp of your money, you are able to focus on other important things in your life. Here are the top three sites that give fantastic advice on how to build a better financial future:

http://getoutofdebt.org/
http://www.daveramsey.com
http://www.suzeorman.com/

Imperfect Angel

Mariah Carey released her debut album, Mariah Carey in 1990. The biracial beauty wowed audiences with her unique vocal range and smooth voice. She smashed the competition with hits like "Vision of Love," "Love Takes Time," and "Someday." She has gone on to sell 160 million records worldwide and is the best selling female artist of all time.

But all that glitters is not gold. The ambitious singer has had several struggles including a highly publicized divorce, a few poorly-reviewed albums and a televised meltdown. The singer bravely ventured out into the world of acting, only to be slammed by the media for her performance in the movie Glitter. Carey has since acted in critically-acclaimed flicks such as Tennessee and the soon to be released Precious. In it, Carey plays a social worker and is already winning rave reviews for her performance.

Through her ups and downs, Carey remains a staple in the music industry. She is happily married to actor Nick Cannon and is set to release her album "Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel" this September. The title couldn't be more fitting for a music legend that has dealt with an imperfect image and for some reason, this makes Mariah Carey seem just perfect.

Weighty Issue

The key to staying healthy is being comfortable in your own skin, right? Of course, maintaining a healthy diet and exercise regime is necessary.

What happens when your weight becomes the center of attention? That appears to be the issue for American Idol Kelly Clarkson. Clarkson has battled the press who continuously criticize her weight. From Hollywood to the music industry, the press just won't except the fact that not everyone is a size zero.

Clarkson is a prime example and a great role model for young women who constantly struggle with their weight. She praises herself and celebrates her body for what it is. Other celebs that proudly flaunt their voluptuous and curvy figures include; Jennifer Lopez, Beyonce, and Christina Hendricks.

Ironically, television host Kelly Ripa is often frowned upon for her incredibly lithe frame. Ripa shuns the naysayers and often mentions that she is proud of her body.

ISS applauds Clarkson and Ripa for their bold statements about their weight. The media is like high school and if you don't stand up for yourself, you will be ridiculed.

Let's celebrate these women for who they are and admire them for just being comfortable in their own skin.

Time Can Heal

Diane Schuler decided to take a ride with her three nieces and daughter one day after camp. Schuler made a life-changing decision the moment she stepped into that car. She decided to drink and drive. Not only was it discovered that she had an absurd amount of alcohol in her system, but she also used marijuana, a substance, a drug known for impairing one's judgement.

On July 26, Schuler drove the wrong-way on the very busy Taconic State Parkway. She ultimately slammed into an oncoming SUV carrying three men. All three were killed.

This could have been Nicole Richie's story. On Decemeber 12, 2006 Richie was driving the wrong way on a California freeway, with prescription drugs in her system. Richie did not have anyone in her car. Luckily, her life and others were spared. But this is not the ending for Schuler.

Sadly this story ends tragically. Schuler took the lives of herself, daughter, three nieces and three innocent men.

How can one forgive a woman who knowingly put herself and others in danger?

Time. Only time will heal the hearts of those who survived. In time can we forgive Schuler and her horrific mistake.

Laugh, laugh, laugh

Have you ever been in a room with people that are dry and dull? If you have, there is nothing like a funny joke to break the dry ice. Laughter is known as the best medicine.
How often do you laugh? What makes you laugh until your belly hurts?

I've pondered these questions, especially during times, I'm in need of comfort. Laughing is a natural way of spreading joy to our bones. It's probably the reason why The Simpsons have been on for so long.

If your into laughter along with a little unorthodox humor, you must visit www.funnyordie.com.

When life throws you lemons, make lemonade and laugh while your doing it.

A Love Lost

As we go through life we try to enjoy the moments that make us happy and get through those tough times where everything around you may feel like its crumbling. Nothing solidifies this notion more so than watching a loved one pass away.
How do you move forward?
Here are some ways to get through the pain and sorrow:

1. Surround yourself with loved ones.
2. Engage in activities that make you feel good inside and out.
3. Trust in your faith 100%
4. Seek bereavement counseling.
5. Create a memory book or photos of that person.
6. Allow yourself to grieve.

This list isn't the final antidote. Always seek professional help if you feel yourself becoming depressed.

Go to www.journeyofhearts.org for more ways of dealing with grief.

The Hard Stuff

A death in the family, a sick loved one, tough financial situations; life can be like an unexpected summer storm.

How do we get through the hard stuff?

Aside from drawing strength from personal experiences, I Stay Strong believes that celebrating literature leads to inspiration. Reading empowers us and finding the right book can be as invigorating as a soak in a hot tub.

Faith, Courage, Wisdom, Strength and Hope by Stacy Chillemi is a wonderful book of poetry that really dotes on the power of positivity and the countless ways we draw strength, especially when we feel hopeless.

Like homemade chicken soup, FCWSH comforts.

The Three FFF's

Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA) is a serious debilitating disease that is very painful. Many who suffer are subjected to taking high doses of various medications. Kerima Brown, 54 of Poughkeepsie, NY was diagnosed with the disease in her early forties. When asked about her management of the disease, Brown says she relies on prayer and her medication. Brown admits that there are very good days and there are days when she feels her body is giving up.

"I just try to thank God for what I have, my arms, my legs etc. I want to be able to grow old and still play with my grandchildren." Sitting in her home, Brown doesn't look like she has the disease, which can become evident. RA can cause arms, hands or feet to deform.

So what keeps Brown grounded? The devout Christian credits her three "FFF's" family and friends for keeping her head up and mind focused on what really matters; enjoying life.

For more information on RA, visit: www.arthritis.org

New Priorities

When Amy Williams* lost her job in April, she already was anticipating spending countless hours online looking for jobs. But Williams decided to shift her focus to more important endeavors.
"I wasn't really in a rush to look for another job. I was actually happy about being laid off. I just wanted to be able to spend more time with my kids." Williams said.

Taking her focus off of the job lost, Williams was able to apply for government programs that she once was overqualified for. This eased the burden off of her and her family.
Although the mother of two has enjoyed birthday parties, cookouts and library readings with her two sons, Williams is now ready to jump back into the job hunt.

"I took the time to really think about what direction I want to go in, but the real benefit has been my time as a stay-at-home mom," Williams says.

Even as unemployment continues to rise, there is no shortage of people looking on the bright side of things. Just ask Williams.

True Fighter

Some little girls dream of making it on the big screen. Most, don't have to battle cancer to get there. Originally published in The Poughkeepsie Journal, New York State's oldest newspaper, Jaclyn Murphy is a cancer survivor. She is also a noted Arlington High School lacrosse player. Murphy's story will be featured on HBO's "Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel."

One can only imagine the agony Murphy underwent as a cancer patient. Cancer comes at any time, at any age. Not only do many patients experience extreme physical pain, but a cancer diagnosis can have tragic results. But turning tragedy into triumph breaks any preconceived notions that cancer can't be defeated. It can. There are many more survivors out there who can inspire us. Murphy's devoted friends are proof. Friends of Jaclyn Foundation supports young children with a pediatric brain tumor.

Stories such as Murphy's are encouraging and Murphy herself should be embraced as a true fighter.

For more information on this story, go to: www.poughkeepsiejournal.com

Tough Love

When I Stay Strong read about Jessica Polmann in an article (U.S News & World Report) about the rise of heroin in the suburbs, it was clear that her fight to remain drug-free was and will always be a struggle.

Instead of wondering about the high school prom or what college they want to attend, teens are falling prey to illegal drugs, particularly heroin. Heroin is fatal, a drug so potent, that anyone can become addicted. While, it is possible to fight this addiction, it will take the support of friends, family and the community to stay clean.

It has been reported that the usage of the prescription drug opiates can lead to heroin addiction. Thought to be known as a inner-city drug, heroin has began to creep into the suburbs.

At the time the article was written, Polmann had been clean for 5 months. She is proof that help for heroin addiction is out there. we can only hope that she continues on her quest to a drug free life.

If you know someone who is a addict or you suspect they may have a drug problem, contact:
www.addict-help.com

I Stay Strong

Welcome to I Stay Strong. Life can sometimes bring about challenges that can change who we are, even if that's not what we want. Circumstances come and go, but it's how you deal with the aftermath that counts. We can choose to be weak or we can choose to be strong. Not only should we be, but we shall stay strong.